Amar’e Stoudemire Out 2-3 Weeks With Ruptured Cyst

by Salvatore Pane

“What, what, what is going on? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?”
-Busta Rhymes

“I can’t deal with this season, and it hasn’t even begun yet.”
-Sal Pane

Edit: I have more to say. You know this means, right? Amar’e’s probably not coming back until November. In the meantime, Melo will play the Stretch 4 where he totally dominates. The Knicks will run through him, and they’ll look unstoppable as they did in the final weeks of the 2011-2012 regular season when Amar’e was also injured. Then, STAT will return, and Melo won’t have as much space on the floor, and Woody will put STAT at the 4 even though everyone wants him to come off the bench. We’ll lose games. Easy ones. To the Raptors. And then the media will go back to the same point it’s been hitting since 2011 even before the Melo trade. CAN THESE TWO WORK TOGETHER?


Answer: I DON’T KNOW PLEASE HELP ME

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